Today morning I had to sit my five and half year old son down and explain to him the concept of a 'stranger'.
It took a lot of effort and a little help from the tradtional fairy tale to explain to him that every adult in this world is not nice to little children. In fact, suffice it to say that I had to literally show him pictures of the Nithari villagers holding up photographs of their children in the newspaper to get him to understand that the big bad witch and wolf do not just exist in story books.
Many times we explain to our children, don't open the door, don't talk to strangers, take nothing form anyone, don't smile at someone if they smile back at you.
And I wonder............"Welcome Xenophobia" and "Paranoia". This is the world view we are giving to them: Close your doors, close yourself to the world, because there are monsters out there.
And, yes, as Nithari shows us, there really are monsters out there.
When I was 12 years old I was molested for the first and last time. My parents took us to a toy store in CP, in Delhi and the toy store salesman felt me up. I still recall the hot shame, shock and anguish those few moments meant to me. I never understood what was happening. The store was crowded and I kept thinking it was my imagination. But the moment I got out of the store, I burst into hot tears. Needless to say my parents told me never to take that kind of treatment from anyone again. They supported me and believed me and taught me the gumption to slap anyone who touched me without permission.
No one ever did touch me again.................at least not without my permission.
But before that I did not even know that adults could treat children that way. Telling my son at half of the age I was, does not feel good. But, we have no choices. And I am sure every parent dreads this 'talk' as much as I did.
Knowledge is power in a world where the mind is warped and with fear. And research shows that history repeats itself in the case of child molestation.
If I was the government of this country, I would hand over the Nithari killers to the parents of those tortured children and let the natural and pagan laws of justice prevail. Sometimes the court of law is too banal for henious crimes.
But when we do start catching the real culprit which is the breeding ground of these horrors?
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1 comment:
it makes sense to tell the young ones early enough.
i remember sudha telling priya many years ago not to accept sweets/biscuits from strangers, especially when the school took them kids on a day-long excursion for the first time.
these must be the perils of modern living in urban areas...
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